My income was cut in half yesterday. I was in shock and think I still am. Has this ever happened to any of you? Takes the wind right out my sails a little. If I dwell on it long enough it takes the wind out of my sails a lot. My ship is stopped. Should I give up? Or should I keep going? The hero in me says, "Keep going Cody!" The coward in me says, "Give up Cody!" Is it easier to keep going or to give up? By giving up I play it safe right? By pushing forward I play the fool.
For those of you following my story, I set out to record a song I wrote called "Are There Any Americans in the Crowd?" a few months back. The recording was a success and now I'm just laying the groundwork for a release in January. I have this idea that this song is meant to be heard right now in our country. It's not just an idea, but a feeling inside my heart. I work in the oilfields of North Dakota and I don't get to see my wife and kids as much as I'd like. The pull toward promoting this song is so strong that a few months back when I had the chance to go home I literally came to a crossroads.
It was at a junction where highway 8 and highway 23 meet between Parshall and New Town, North Dakota. As I rolled up to the stop sign my heart started racing. I felt myself strongly desirous to turn right. Turning right would mean that a loving wife and 4 wonderful children would greet me after a 1,000 mile drive to Utah. Turning left would mean a lonely 1500 mile drive to Nashville. My mind filled with patriotic thoughts of America. A responsibility and duty to my country turned my steering wheel to the left. Turning left also meant that I would spend thousands of dollars on recording a song that people might not like. Of course I want to believe that people will love it, but sometimes my doubts get the best of me.
I drove about 2-1/2 hours before I realized that my transmission was stuck in 3rd gear. It wouldn't go into overdrive. This was discouraging, because now my 21 hour drive would take even longer, because I would only be able to go about 55mph instead of 80. If I pushed the rpms too high for too long I would burn up my motor. I stopped at a transmission repair shop and they said they were 2 weeks out from being able to work on it. I topped off the tranny fluid and drove on. I began to feel discouraged. Maybe I should've turned right. What's the point of trying to get a stupid song out into the world when my world was at home in Utah with my wife and kids? A dream can be a really lonely thing sometimes.
I drove through Minnesota and Wisconsin wondering if I was doing the right thing. I had a rough recording of the song on my phone and listened to it over and over again through my headphones to keep my morale up. I would've plugged it into my car stereo, but my car is over 20 years old and didn't have a USB port. My mom owned the car before me and its on its second engine with over 380,000 miles on the odometer. I think the transmission is original and probably the reason for it getting stuck in 3rd. Anyway, I was somewhere outside of either Minneapolis or Chicago when something happened that struck me to my core.
I was going through a jumbled mess of inner-city over passes and under passes when I looked up briefly to see a woman standing behind chain link fencing surrounded with and holding signs that said things like Never Forget and Remember 9/11. Tears instantly came to my eyes. I had lost all track of time working in the oil field and didn't even realize the date. It was Sept. 11th 2015. An overwhelming sense of duty and obligation filled my soul. My determination to do my part in honoring and standing up for everything that America stands for hit my heart. I was totally caught off guard by the power of patriotism that hit me in that moment. I continued onto Nashville with a new resolve and the song was recorded in just a couple days.
I then pointed my car west and drove 1700 miles home. I discovered that in the early morning when my transmission was cool I could get it to shift into overdrive and travel 80 mph. After it heated up it would stay in overdrive until I came to a stop. The first stop of the day came in Kansas when I had to stop at a toll booth. Then I was stuck in 3rd again. It's been a while now since I made that trip. I'm still working in North Dakota and trying to get things ready for the song release in January. I hope I am able to present the song to as many people as I possibly can in as many ways as I can prepare.
I've got a radio station in Utah that will play it. I'm hoping to shoot a music video in the next week or so for the song. I'm working on a website too where people can join me as I try to get the song out to the world. This isn't easy. I'd like to invite all of you who have been following my story to make it your own when the time comes. We all have hardships and setbacks. We all have tough choices between going left and going right. Sometime we feel alone on our journeys and wonder if the odds are stacked against us. Keep moving forward America. I don't think it's too late to save our country.
I still believe there are good people in this land who love their country. These are the people I wrote this song for. These are the people I want to invite to make the song their own. For this to work I will need everyones help. I have been blessed to live in so many wonderful parts of our country. I have friends and family throughout the states. I've lived in Nevada, Missouri, Utah, Oregon, Idaho, Arizona, Massachusetts and Tennessee. As a truck driver I have driven through most of the 48 states. I have seen where Americans live. I have seen our industry. I have seen our communities. One night I came through a little town in Texas that was filled with the American spirit of small town America. I parked my rig in an empty lot and walk down to the town square. I read the bronze plaques around the square. There was a gazebo and bronze sculptures throughout the town.
I don't remember everything I read there, but I remember the spirit I felt. There were businesses around the block and I looked at their displays through the windows. I took in the smells and warm air of Texas that night. I don't remember the name of the town, but there are hundreds of thousands of them all across the country. Our ancestors and ourselves have worked too hard to let all of this slip away into chaos. Let us hold our ground and maintain our convictions about our love of country and duty to support and defend her from evil and corruption wherever it might be.
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